Wow… I haven’t blogged in so long I don’t even know where to begin. So many things have happened and so much has changed that I’m not sure if I can fit it all into a single post. So I reckon I’ll just have to pick the most important events/happenings and call it a day.
1) My social anxiety is next to zilch thanks to a change of medication. Pristiq + Propranolol (beta blocker) = no social anxiety, which totally kicks ass because I’m having a great time living my life for the first time in 26 years.
2) Nanny had a stroke a little over a month ago. She’s still wheelchair bound but she’s determined and a fighter so I have all faith that she’ll recover with time.
So far her recovery has been speedy. She can pick up her left leg, move her left arm a little bit (she still has a long way to go with that) and her speech is near perfect when she has her teeth in.
As for what I’ve been doing… random shit. Mostly visiting Nanny, hanging out with friends, sun-bathing and swimming along with lots of job application filling out.
I’m so tired of seeing those forms but I want a job badly and need one at that but my social anxiety has made it harder to get hired as I’ve never had a job because of it… but that won’t stop me from trying!
Basically I’m just living my life, having fun and taking care of my Nanny who is THE most important person in my life. She pretty much raised me and she’s the ONLY one in my family that treats me like a human being instead of a verbal punching bag. I hate seeing her so distraught and… trapped. I wish that I could take her place but I can’t and that’s what kills me the most…
No matter how much I help and visit I can’t take away her sadness or fix her situation but I have to remind myself that she’s a fighter and she WILL pull through this.
So as you can see I’m still alive. Very much so. I’ll try to get my postings back on track but I make no guarantees as I never know when I’ll be on the computer long enough to actually type a post out. But I figured I’d at least let you know that I’m alive and well.
I miss you guys and I highly appreciate all of you who still support me. In times like this I can use all the support I can get, so thank you for sticking with me, even if I am a sucky blogger *hugs*
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Sorry to hear about your nanny
I hope she will be fine.
Comment by Malin infektia.net on July 20th, 2010 @ 2:32 am
I am also sorry to hear about your nanny, but I admire you for taking care of her.
Comment by Ashley rainbow-stuff.com on July 24th, 2010 @ 7:50 pm
I hope your Nanny recovers swiftly and i’m sorry to hear about the stroke. If she’s already moving both sides of her body and her speech is almost back to normal that’s a really good sign! She’s lucky to have such a caring granddaughter. It’s great about your new confidence too!!! I think your new meds and helping your nanny recover might be the boost you need to take the next step to overcoming your anxiety. Keep up the confidence!
Comment by Zoe valueslim.biz on August 5th, 2010 @ 2:53 am